I’ve heard of the Conservative Party and I’ve heard of the Labour Party but I’ve only just started hearing about the Pyjama Party. I’m not quite clear what the policies of the Pyjama Party are but it seems peace, goodwill and togetherness have something to do with it. Apparently, when Gordon Brown was Prime Minister, members of the Pyjama Party were invited over to Chequers to mingle with members of the Labour Party. Or have I got that wrong?
Personally, I wouldn’t vote for the Pyjama Party, although it does sound slightly more interesting than the others. I find pyjamas hilarious. Ever since I began seeing films in which men had sex with women I realised that real men didn’t wear pyjamas. Only Rock Hudson and Doris Day did that. So I resolved to throw out my pyjamas and I haven’t owned any for forty years. To me, wearing pyjamas seems about as absurd as wearing a wetsuit in the shower. What is the point? When you go to bed you should be naked. I don’t want to reach out and feel winceyette. I want to feel skin. When skin touches skin oxytocin gets released. And that’s very good for bonding. So get naked and improve your relationship.