Everything tends to deteriorate with age. You can’t run as fast as you used to, and you start to forget names. But you can slow the deterioration, and even reverse it for a time, through the right kind of physical and mental exercise. And sex is no different.
If you don’t want to lose your sexual capability as an older man then one of the things you need to exercise is your ‘testosterone factory’. And it’s quite easy to do because testosterone production responds very easily to all kinds of influences. It fluctuates significantly during the course of a day, as well as during the course of a year, and a lifetime. One of the things it responds to is the sight of a naked woman, especially a woman ready and willing to engage in sexual intercourse. But here’s the funny thing (and it’s known as the ‘Coolidge Effect’). A woman you’ve never had sex with before is far more stimulating than a woman you have had sex with. There’s a simple biological mechanism at work. From the point of view of spreading your genes, it makes sense to move on to a new woman as soon as you’ve had sex. That’s why a new woman is more exciting. And pornography supplies a constant stream of new women.
But pornography also has its dangers for the older man. Even if you don’t ejaculate or masturbate at all while watching pornography, it nevertheless takes its toll on your body. A little is stimulating, a lot is exhausting. The chemicals you need to sensitise your skin and erect your penis become depleted, just as if you had actually had sex. Apart from which, looking at dozens of vulvas a day, day after day, must eventually diminish their power to arouse.
It’s like the story of Goldlilocks. You have to find what’s just right for you.
And what about the idea that women don’t respond to pornography? Well, it’s just not true. They do. But not as strongly as men. And they certainly don’t seek it out in the way that men do. Women just aren’t turned on so much by the visual. But scientific measurements show that women do lubricate when they see pornography. So now and then it might be a nice idea to watch a few minutes together.