The story about the human sexuality class at Northwestern University, Chicago, is just the latest to underline how frightened and guilty so many people are when it comes to sex. For those who missed it, it appears that on the 21st February Professor John Michael Bailey allowed a couple to demonstrate the use of a vibrator in front of about 100 students. The couple, named as Jim Marcus and his fiancÃ©e Faith Kroll, volunteered, and the students had been warned to leave if they objected. So it’s difficult to see why so many parents and commentatorsÂ complained so strongly. The professor himself said he would give an F grade to the arguments put forward by his critics. Quite right.
The first school lesson I received in sexÂ involved frogs. I spent the next few months under the impression that human sex was accomplished onÂ Sunday nights, with the man clinging to his partner’s back while she crawled around the bath.
Several columnists recently have anguished over what to say to children who accidentally come across sex scenes on the internet. Well, why not explain that the people are…having sex? Is that so terrible?Â ‘They’re having sex, which is a lovely and beautiful thing that you’ll be able to do when you’re older.’
The secrecy and embarrassment causes children to think that there must be something wrong with sex. They grow up feeling guilty and inhibited and, in turn,Â pass on their anxieties to their children. The cycle is endless and it causes a lot of misery.
Incidentally, Faith said that she was an exhibitionist and was turned on by having an audience watch her naked with the vibrator. Try using this as a fantasy next time you have sex and see what happens.